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Sunday, February 22, 2015

NADINE L'ESPERANCE


There are no real words to describe how just plain fucking cool Nadine is. I think this'll be the third or fourth time I say, in print, that she is one of the last bastions of punk rock as fuck film making, and as such brings out my crass teen writing voice when introducing and talking to her. You just get the feeling of being in a room that smells like stale beer, sitting on a couch that's been broken since the seventies, and bullshitting around while Surf Nazis blares on the television.

She's also super hard to keep track of, so keep an eye out on the Blue Girl Productions website here.

Alright, enough gushing, let's get to the conversation. I chose not to edit some things I said I would because, well, it makes the conversation more fun if I don't. 


Alright intros are always tricky, so gimme a quick one and I'll work a question around it then we'll go from there.

Getting interviewed by anyone is always fucking awesome! Thank you for showing an interest in my cheesy films.

Look, I'm the guy who has made people forceably watch Rock N Roll Nightmare numerous times. There's no way I can't be drawn to cheesy films. Especially from Canada!

Wicked!

I actually found out about you in the most roundabout way. First I saw Samantha Mack at a Gwarbecue, then I saw the No Pets Allowed trailer, then I realized I followed the both of you on twitter. And then it finally all clicked in that maybe I had something here.

That's totally rad dude. I love it when random strangers find my shit.

But yeah, gimme a run down of what you've put out there. I mentioned No Pets Allowed, but that is your fourth flick. Tell the readers what you do. Just imagine that question in the voice of the dad in the Twisted Sister videos

[Laughs]

Holy Fuck I just pictured that!

I am just your average Joe who one day picked up a camera to enter an amateur zombie film contest in my home city. I decided that's a blast making films and never looked back. Now still as a DIY, I have traveled to many places with my DIY films. I write, direct, produce, edit, sound, make-up and do basically everything in them. 

I mean, if you do catering too, I like to call that the micro-budget EGOT

I don't cater.Just snackadoos and in No Pets Allowed my Mom was the caterer for my cast.

Hey. Snacks are important, man.

Snacks ROCK!

I will straight up murder a man that bad mouths snacks.

No shit dude. I'm a snacky kinda gal. Especially NACHOS!

See now I kind of want to end the interview now and go get some nachos, but journalistic integrity and all.

Yes. Let's keep it "Pro." 

...

I want Nachos now

One of us is going to eat nachos at the end of this interview. And I live close to a 7-11.

Mmmmm....nasty nacho cheese!

Now I feel like it's cheating to call your films punk rock as fuck as the sound track to No Pets Allowed is literally that, but you definitely got that edge there that honestly reminds me a lot of mid-nineties Troma stuff.

OH DUDE! I had Terror in Toronto call my film a "Punk Rock ClusterFuck" and "If John Waters had a baby with Troma" "A Tromatic Film." I get the coolest,trashiest comments and I love it

Oh man, so that totally has to be what you're going for, right? Basically, this is me putting on the James Lipton hat and asking what inspires you? What are your goals?

What actually inspires me is horror and really bad jokes...I actually love in poor taste jokes and bodies and blood everywhere. Evil Dead inspires me and my goal is to make the cheesiest, scary, punk rock horror feature film.

Now we talking Evil Dead 1 inspiration, Evil Dead 2 inspiration, or Evil Dead feel so bad about yourself remake inspiration?

I have THREE Evil Dead tattoos, so the old ones. I love the originals. The remake-- I looked at it as a whole new entity and enjoyed it, NOT my beloved Evil Dead though.

I loved the remake, and liked the plan of doing two remake universe movies, then a crossover with the original. But now Ash is getting a TV show, so I'm down.

NO SHIT right? I so can't wait. Bruce Campbell is the shit; my cheesy inspiration! I'm a 70's/80's horror whore. C.H.U.D., Critters, Hellraiser, Friday the 13th, Halloween. 

I am obsessed with Friday the 13th.

Who the fuck isn't???

I really hope that the new one hits its release date this year. Because it will be my birthday, and the 13th Friday the 13th in theaters. 

(EDITORS NOTE: TURNS OUT IT WON'T BECAUSE FUCK EVERYTHING)

Fuck yeah!Also coming out with a new game!

I saw that! And as a man who spent -- well I will not tell you how much -- on the San Diego Comic Con Exclusive 8-Bit Jason action figure, I am double hyped.

Man, we are so off topic.

Totally we are

So you are straight up DIY. How'd you learn all your tricks? Because No Pets Allowed, like I told you before the interview, looks straight up like pro Giallo work.

I learned on my own.Still learning'

Alright so, you're learning all these makeup effects on your own. What resources do you turn to? I'm genuinely curious about DIY special effects how-to guides.

I actually went to make-up school for a diploma.SO i did my own effects for everything EXCEPT No Pets Allowed; I got to hire a pro, and my SPFX girl won and award for my film in San Diego at FANtastic Horror Film Festival.

See this is what I get for not researching! I had no idea you went to make-up school!

I have many secrets under my sleeve..MWAHAHA!

Alright, so now I am curious. I used to go to school at a college that was near the Tom Savini school, and every Halloween the students'd come over and do makeup for I think class credit. That is literally all I know about it. What's make-up school even like? Like, break down an average course load and what not.

I did a full time course for 6 months. Every day for 6 hours. Learning technique is RAD if you already have an artist's eye. It was a great fucking course. Plus, it was a fucking blast making the bloodiest stuff. I graduated with honours.

EDITOR'S NOTE: I EVEN SAVED THE UNNECESSARY "U"S IN THIS CONVERSATION, SINCE I AM NICE TO MY CANADIAN PALS

See I went to art school for screenwriting. Four year degree in the heart of Center City Philadelphia. All the major classes were great, but then you'd have to take like regular college classes. And man, an art school science class is a thing to behold.

Sweet baby SATAN..you have more experience than I do!

I am a Cannon films junkie, so I gotta ask, what makes the perfect action scene?

When the actors have it in their heart to get ready to die for the film; the PASSION!

Freddy versus Jason: who's better?

Freddy versus Jason? No fucking contest!

I am going to assume you answered correctly, with Jason.

Um fuck yeah, because you answered the same thing earlier! 

[LAUGHS]

Alright alright last question: unlimited budget or the ability to have a cast made up of any actor living or dead: which do you choose?

Bruce Campbell in a creature feature!

THAT COULD BE EITHER ONE!

This is my DREAM!

You have a damn good dream!

After that part, we kind of just yell at each other a little bit more. Easily one of my favorite interviews I've done. 


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